Saturday, December 16, 2006

God Rest Ye Merry... Parodies?

I'm working on a parody of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen. I think it shall be called Cod Rest Ye Merry, Gentle Hats, but I'm not sure. Here's some snippets:

Warning: If making fun of religion will make you madder than a hatter, then stop reading...right about...HERE.

1. God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen
Let nothing you dismay
Though the word's that Christ, our Saviour,
Was born just yesterday.
Word gets around, but grapevine's rotten,
The good thing is what they now say:
Oh, tidings of junk food and toys, junk food and toys,
Oh, tidings of junk food and toys.

2. Maybe I am too sarcastic:
Must be the way I was raised
Since shrinks, they always seem to find
The parents are to blame...
Tecno-myths replacing tales
Of gods, and heroes slain
Putting words in your gods's mouths,
Again -
Are you at it again?
Words that do not belong to them...
You repeat offender
You put your words in your gods's mouths,
Once again

There'll be more, I promise. And if you're mad, look at it one of two ways:

  1. I'm jealous of people who have something to belive in, since I just have an odd, slightly insincere hodgepodge of religions to my name


  2. I'm being philosophical... Free speech, right...? GET THOSE PITCHFORKS AWAY FROM ME! Wait... Where did you get pichforks? Over there? Well... I HAVE PITCH-SPORKS! AND A LARGE SUPPLY OF BLEEPERIN!* COME AT ME... WAIT, DON'T! I DON'T WANNA DIE...!

*A spork is a spoon with little fork tines. Bleeperin is something fictional that can apply to anything that helps after enduring reading a Suethor's fiction (and berating it; aka "to spork"); Brain Bleach can be used to erase all memories of it completely, and both are silly and fictional. So there. No hay de queso, no mas de papa, you know? That, of course, is if you're thanking me for the laugh. Which I sorta doubt. Once again I'm really sorry if anyone's offended. Don't come after me with pitchforks please. Remember, I have the flamingos - and the potatoes! - on my side.

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The meek are too meek to inherit

It's Raining Cats and Frogs
And the geek shall inherit the earth.
The GEEK, I said!
Are you hard of hearing or something? The GEEK!

I am a geek.